Where Has the Love Gone?

Bill Brinkworth

When a couple falls in love, there is a lot of romance.  They go out to dinner.  He gives her flowers. She brags about him to her friends.  He cannot wait to see her after work.

The romance continues.  They get married.  Now the dates are even better.  They go everywhere together, and then, a transformation slowly unfolds.  He has stay at work a little longer, and misses the planned Friday night date. Money is spent before it is received, so the flowers are out of the question for one week, and then, the next week.  Marriage can be difficult, and instead of bragging about her husband to her friends, she finds herself complaining about his faults to them.  Slowly, over time, the relationship is no longer what it once was. Is the love still there?  Many times, there still is love; it just got crowded out by things that have been given a higher priority than they should have. Often a relationship between a person and the Lord deteriorates in a similar manner.  At first, they are so excited about being saved and forgiven for all their sins. They attend church every time the doors are opened: Sunday morning, Sunday night, and Wednesday night. Every day they start out with a prayer time with the Lord and read their Bibles faithfully. Every opportunity that arises, they try to tell others about the Lord and how they too can be saved from a burning hell.

However, sometimes a transformation in their love life with the Lord slowly occurs. At the time, their reason for not having time in the morning for prayer time and Bible reading seemed legitimate. Perhaps, it was also a legitimate reason why they could not attend church on Sunday.  Maybe even sickness caused them to stay home from church on Sunday. Perhaps the reason for stopping spiritual things was too much familiarity — when doing things repetitively, sometimes a person loses interest in doing them. Soon however, the reasons change to, “I have too many things to do today to go to church.” Sometimes, to cover up for their backsliding away from the Lord, other reasons surface, like, “I don’t get anything out of reading my Bible every time, so why do it?”, or “No one talks to me at church, so why go?”

No matter how it happens, too many find themselves further away from God than they ever would have imagined they would be. They find themselves without the fervor, excitement, and love for the Lord and the things of God they once had.  Are they out love with their Saviour?  Many times they are not out of love with their Saviour; it is just because too many things got a higher priority than they deserved. They find themselves in the same position that the early church of Ephesus found itself when John had to write to them and tell them, “Nevertheless I have somewhat against thee, because thou hast left thy first love.” (Revelation 2:4) Their love for God had not moved at all; it was where they had left it.  They just needed to go back where they had left it, and pick up where they left off. Here are some things that can be done to help one get back the love for Christ they once had:

“Are you happy with where you are spiritually now?”

“Well, no”

“Well, maybe you need to pay the price to get back to the place you once were.  God may never have wanted you to get in the place you are now, anyway.  It was your decision, and look where it got you.  It would be well worth it, to pay the price, whatever it is, to get back to where you need to be!”


Do all you did before, and more, when you had “your first love” with the Lord.  He has not gone anywhere.  He is still in the same place you left Him.  Revitalize your relationship with the Lord.  He certainly will forgive you, and you can start all over again — this time better!
“And thou shalt love the LORD thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might.” Deuteronomy 6:5  Also: Mark 12:30, I John 4:19

“Self-love seeks to use God.  True love seeks to please God!”


This lesson was featured in The Bible View #278.

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